G-hawd

I am here to declare G-hawd, the Southern redneck version of holy war.

Islamofascists have Jihad, and we have G-hawd.

We declare G-hawd on the Jihad.

We southerners pride ourselves on our rich tradition of self-reliance, independence, patriotism, God-and-country issues, and other outgrowths of the liberties afforded us by our forefathers.

And most of us are armed. Most of us have multiple firearms.

If and when the Jihadists decide they will launch a concerted terror attack against citizens on our own soil by inducing urban warfare or hand-to-hand combat, we will be ready--more so than most of our fellow citizens.

Normally we are not considered 'armed and dangerous.' We are ordinary citizens leading ordinary lives. We are polite, mannerly, hard-working, God-fearing, country-loving human beings who under normal conditions would not hurt a flea.

You would never know by looking at us that when our lives, families, fellow citizens, and property are threatened we immediately morph into combat-machines if necessary.

Strike us if you dare, but the Jihadists need to know upfront that the G-hawd is nothing to be trifled with. We will fight to the death if necessary. We will confront you head-on with all of the weaponry in our arsenal, which collectively is considerable.

We have absolutely no intention of allowing you to cripple this country or to conduct mass murders in the name of your religion.

So don't fancy yourselves on getting all those virgins in heaven if you die in this war. Most of us believe in Hell, and we believe with all of our hearts that it is to Hell you will go because of your exceedingly wicked, despicable, and contemptible deeds.

We are not 'the Great Satan' as you call us. But we know how to arrange a quick face-to-face meeting with him just for you. Attack us, and you will find out.